Tag: grief

First Tattoo

It has been a while since I posted and I have been in a never ending reading slump but I was talking to a friend and they suggested making this post. It’s a bit different to my usual content.

On the 1st September, I had my first ever tattoo. I had always wanted a tattoo, though never enough to commit to the idea and permanence of having one. I have loved a specific design for many years, inspired by a cover of Moby Dick on my leg. Similarly from teens to today some ideas have come and gone like angel wings, Roman sleeves and even Attack on Titan designs.

In April I lost my cousin to suicide and sin then and now many people have had tributes to him, my father has had a torso tattoo, and others have had J’s and semi-colons in memory of him, apparently a semi-colon is a symbol for suicide prevention and mental health. I decided I would have one too and not only in tribute to my cousin, but to have a piece of him with me always. He wasn’t just a cousin to me, but an older brother – along side his brother, growing up they were the siblings I never had. You always assume your contemporaries will always be with you, but sometimes life decides its not meant to be. Always expected we would be together laying our parents to rest, not our parents laying him to rest. A great man taken decades too soon. A wound that will never heal.

I booked my tattoo back in June and the earliest available date was 1st September, which was meant to be because that was my cousin’s 41st birthday. So on that day I had it done and I am very happy with it.

The design is his fingerprints in the shape of a heart with four birds flying from it, one for each decade of his life. As of now it is my first and only tattoo, and I would have been happy without having one but for a first tattoo it is one I will never regret. I do wish I could have my cousin back instead of it. But that will never be.

RIP James, I will love you forever, and live with you in mind. Life is short and live for today, tomorrow is not guaranteed.

My Malaise

I started the year very happy and optimistic especially when it comes to my reading and it started quite strongly with some very enjoyable reads and new experiences like manga and the saucy type of manga but in recent weeks my reading has slumped.

For many weeks I have literally read a page a day to maintain my Kindle reading streak but over the past ten days of so I have now gone about 5 or 6 days without opening my Kindle. I just feel a malaise and slump and can’t seem to pull myself out of it.

My last reading was finishing Last Testament in Bologna by Tom Benjamin and I haven’t picked up my Kindle since then. This is highly unusual for me, my reading streak was about 150 consecutive days and over 400 weeks in a row. Its very rare I had a missed day unless something cropped up or a server glitch.

I think personal life has contributed to it, as I am currently grieving still for a shock family bereavement in April. It really affected me and though I never saw the person as much as I used to, since his passing I cannot stop thinking about him and how his act and loss has destroyed and forever changed my family and its future. Reading, games are my forms of escapism and they offer little to no comfort for me currently, especially if there are scenes of abuse and self harm.

I am not depressed or anything, just wanted to write my thoughts and feelings and get it off my chest for myself. It is very cathartic to write it out and it helps. Only I probably will read this so its fine.